For as long as I can remember when it comes to relationships, “You give 50 percent and he give 50 percent”, is what I heard. Especially if you were in the Baby Boomer era. I was thinking then, if we both are whole (100 percent each), and we only give half of ourselves into the relationship, what happens to the other 50 percent of each? That’s just me and my crazy way of thinking. But in my mind, it made and still does make perfect sense.

Either those who were giving the information– most likely our parents or some relative trying to be helpful, knew something about us or didn’t really know what they were saying. Did they believe we were functioning in only 50 percent capacity, damaged from the happenings of life?

What has happened to us that makes us feel as though we need another person to make us feel complete? I’m waiting on your answers. Many of us grew up in single parent homes, missing a father or mother. Could it be from the struggles we saw them endure? It could be anything. The emptiness we feel from our lives. The fact that we’re not where we think we’re supposed to be, failure, the thoughts and perspective we have of ourselves. Who told us we were not complete? Where did that come from?

Which leads to my next point about depending on others to complete us. If I NEED “you” to complete me, what happens if and or when “you” leave? I have given “you” way too much power. You are now in control of my completeness and like I said in the title, “Child please”!

I can see why there are so many broken-hearted people in the earth. I see why we cannot love others as we love OURSELVES like we were commanded as sons. We have a problem with us. We’re malfunctioning because we’re less than full. Because of life, cultures and environments that we’ve been raised in, we have lost some of our 100.

We find the one we said is the one, who makes us happy and entire, and smilingly walk down the aisle and say all those special words. Not knowing that we are taking less than 100 percent into that union. And if he/she (I mean this in respect to if you are a male or female who’s reading this) is doing the same, we have a mess on our hands and a sure recipe for extra problems, insecurities, and sad to say divorce. And hello — leaving one relationship going into another one, thinking it’s going to be better than the last, is not and will not be the solution. Why, because the damaged, half you, have not been dealt with, and you’ll be taking “THAT YOU” into the next relationship; which will have the same results.

Let’s all pause and take a look into an imaginary mirror and ask ourselves,“knowing what I know about myself, would I marry me”? Be honest, I know some of y’all popped off yes right away. “I’m good” is what you said! For those who can’t see me, know that I am smiling, almost laughing. I am not saying we don’t or shouldn’t have a problem with being incomplete.

I will say, the only one who can make us whole is the one who created us. He completes us with what we lost from the very beginning, His presence, and through Jesus we can get it back. Just like the birds need the air to properly function, seeds need soil, we “need” the presence of God. It’s the environment He created us to be in and flow in purpose successfully.

Adam was by himself in the Garden of Eden (I know the animals were there). He didn’t ask God for a helpmate. He was complete being who he was and where he was, not even knowing he needed anyone. It was God who said it wasn’t good for him to be alone.

This is how He created us to be, whole individuals, not dependent upon mankind to make us feel that way. When we accept Christ into our lives, we need to allow Him to mend us, heal our brokenness, hurt, failures, toxic thoughts. Basically, we need to be renewed, so that we can truly love our God with all of our heart, soul and strength. And, love our neighbors as we love ourselves for real; let’s take back our authority.

King Jesus, “YOU” complete me; now you said something!